I've been bombarded by Twilight the last two or so days. It's rather annoying. The peers I have spoken to say the movie is ok, but it's plot is somewhat flat, and an ex-co-worker vampire aficionado would have said 'It Sucks' except, as it's a vampire movie, that might be taken as a compliment. So today I said "FINE, fine, I'll watch it so the next time I get bombed with it I can have a legitimate opinion." I have it paused a couple min.s in right now. I had an idea, so I'm going to be odd and do it: I'm going to write any notable (imo) thoughts I have about it while I'm watching it. Well, pause it to write them, otherwise I'll probably miss half the movie.

If you see only part of this review, that means I saved what I have so far so it doesn't accidentally get lost and I am still watching it.


three...two....one...


What was that noise that startled the deer? (such an enlightening thought, lol There was probably something obvious I missed 'cause of a skip in that part)

WASHINGTON! WOO!!!!!! I know someone who made a similar journey when she was a kid, from near there in Arizona to the arid half of Washington that I live in. Completely different reasons, though.

Jacob is hot. Why didn't they put HIM on the posters? I would have gotten one. Mud pies, lol. But this is supposed to be Washington, mud is plentiful, no matter which half you live in. MUD BATH ALL THE WAY!!!

Interrupted by phone, now back to movie!

*bonk* Watch out for flying Balls! Oops, sorry, warned you too late. *starts eating pomegranate* More round objects, yay. (no popcorn left in the cupboard, I checked)

*starts channeling what should happen but probably won't* "Mine, stop flirting with him!" "If you think apologizing to someone for hitting a volleyball into their head is flirting, I'll be sure never to apologize to you, wouldn't want you to think I'm flirting with you"

"Hey, aren't people from Arizona supposed to be, like, really tanned?" *chokes* "Yeah, maybe that's why they kicked me out" O.O *dies* See? My line was better! *gets resurrected by random passing breeze*

#1"You met my home girl?" #2"Your girl?" #3"My girl! *kiss, grab #2's chair, pulls out from under #2 and runs*" HA! That was actually funny. Totally random, but funny. Need to remember that.

"The blond one who looks like he's in pain" LOLRH, he does! Ahem, apparently this is a comedy, which I hadn't known before, I thought it was supposed to be a horror tinted typical teenage drama. But I'm lmao more for this than most official comedies, and I'm only ten minutes in.

"An Animal?" "Your not in pheonix anymore" How True! We've got Big Foot and the American Lion and Aliens up here! And Vampires, apparently, though I hadn't known that one before *snicker* A-Z Monsters, just about. Hmm, can anyone think of a 'Z' monster? I can't think of one right now.

"You know, your mood swings are kinda giving me whiplash" LOL! Quarter of the way through the movie and still thinking it's a comedy.

Port Angeles? Awesome! I celebrated my 20th B-Day there. Or was it my nineteenth one? Exactly a year before, exact same time of year and month, American Lions were heard there. I was so disappointed when I found that out. I'd missed them by a year. That would have been the best B-Day EVER, if only I'd gone a year sooner. *sigh*

Edward: *thinking* Damn, didn't mean to say that, 'I saw what they were doing', not 'I heard what they were thinking' How am I going to talk my way out of this one? Definitely still a comedy.

Ok, apparently the answer to that a sentence farther on: Screw it, I'm just gong to say a bit of the truth. Just a bit, though, that's it Which is bound to eventually become "Edward, I don't think there are any beans left in the bag, in fact, I think you dumped the whole bag of beans on the floor."

"Money. Sex. Money. Cat." Rotflol! Ok, not actually enough room on the floor to do that, but at the least, I'm surprised the back of my chair hasn't fallen off yet. The screw just sorta comes undone more and more till the back lists to the side, and: *thud*

HIS SKIN IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!

Now it's finally starting to feel like it's a vampire movie. Not particularly hardcore, but that's not really what I expect from it. Time to meet the potential in-laws *snicker*

Food Channel anyone? They are having too much fun.
"Is she even Italian?" "Her name is Bella." Ok, it's a comedy again.
"Ooo, get a whiff of that. Here comes the human." His family is insane. And that grin is creeping me out. It is momentarily a horror movie again *shiver* but it'll go right back to comedy when I hit play.
"You've given us an excuse to use the kitchen for the first time" See? Back to comedy.
Yep, now to the awkward bits I was expecting.
So that is why he looks like he is "always in pain" It makes sense now!
Wow, Graduation Hat Display. Genius.

"OK, Now I see why you need the thunder" While I can see my BFF's point on the ball survivability, I can fully hold up the flag I waved when it was just described to me: ITS FUNNY! It may flunk science class, but vampires playing baseball is hilarious. Now that I think about, I saw a mythbusters ep on the ball subject once, minus the vampires of course, but I don't remember their findings.

Finally, some action! Vampire duel, those are always fun.

Ok, that is just cute, he lifted her up on his feet to dance!


Final Assessment: As a Comedy, it's quite good. As a Teen Drama, imo it is better than most (of course, I abhor most of those, but the occasional one is almost good) As Horror? Its not horror, no matter how many people try to claim that anything with vampires is automatically horror. And the fight scene was disappointing.

Anne Rice is the Queen of the Damned, for their Princess in the Teen section, Amelia Atwater-Rhodes is the undisputable ranking royal. (As of the time I am writing this, at least) Sure, I watched the movie instead of reading the book, the book is always more interesting than the movie, but if I ever read the book, I'm certain I will have the same opinion.

Oh yes, one final note: There is actually one thing that surprised me in the whole movie (besides the diamond skin, that isn't a plot line, its a detail) What is that? The state of the girl's mortality at the end of the movie. I think it's a first.